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Positive thinking

Permanently Parents

The Changing Nest
Once individuals become parents, they are parents forevermore. Their identities change perceptively the moment Mother Nature inaugurates them mom or dad. Yet the role they undertake when they welcome children into their lives is not a fixed one. As children move from one phase of their lives to the next, parental roles change. When these transitions involve a child gaining independence, many parents experience an empty nest feeling. Instead of feeling proud that their children have achieved so much—whether the flight from the nest refers to the first day of kindergarten or the start of college—parents feel they are losing a part of themselves. However, when approached thoughtfully, this new stage of parental life can be an exciting time in which mothers and fathers rediscover themselves and relate to their children in a new way.

As children earn greater levels of independence, their parents often gain unanticipated freedom. Used to being depended upon by and subject to the demands of their children, parents sometimes forget that they are not only mom or dad but also individuals. As the nest empties, parents can alleviate the anxiety and sadness they feel by rediscovering themselves and honoring the immense strides their children have made in life. The simplest way to honor a child undergoing a transition is to allow that child to make decisions and mistakes appropriate to their level of maturity. Freed from the role of disciplinarian, parents of college-age children can befriend their offspring and undertake an advisory position. Those with younger children beginning school or teenagers taking a first job can plan a special day in which they express their pride and explain that they will always be there to offer love and support.

An empty nest can touch other members of the family unit as well. Young people may feel isolated or abandoned when their siblings leave the nest. As this is normal, extra attention can help them feel more secure in their newly less populated home. Spouses with more leisure time on their hands may need to relearn how to be best friends and lovers. Other family members will likely grieve less when they understand the significance of the child’s new phase of life. The more parents both celebrate and honor their children’s life transitions, the less apprehension the children will feel. Parents who embrace their changing nest while still cherishing their offspring can look forward to developing deeper, more mature relationships with them in the future.

Source:
Daily Om

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Time Management

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Few simple tips for managing your time better
According to recent data — and most people’s experience –the workweek is expanding and leisure time is evaporating, not only for top-level executives but for the average person as well. Most experts advocate organization as the key to getting a grip on time. They suggest you start by asking what your real goals are for yourself, your family, and your career. With goals established, break your time down into manageable segments.

Use a monthly calendar for short-term scheduling and a 6-month calendar for long-range scheduling. Pencil in all things that pertain to your goals, including classes you want to take (learning a computer program for your job or mastering the piano for fun), regular exercise sessions, social events, and family time.
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On a daily action list, categorize tasks: those that need immediate attention (you had better do them yourself), those that can be delegated (you can hire a teenager to mow the lawn or to clean the garage, for example), and those that can be put off. To avoid procrastination, tackle the toughest jobs first, breaking them into smaller, less daunting components.
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Free up time for the things you really want to do by simplifying your life. Let go of activities (your third church committee assignment or polishing the car every week, for example) that don’t contribute to your goals.
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Reduce the waste – and frustration – of everyday delays. Wherever you go, take reading material or a portable player with music you want to hear. Then when you have to wait, you can make good use of or enjoy the time.
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Set aside a half-hour toward the end of the day to worry. Psychologist Roland Nathan believes that having a formal worrying time cuts down the amount of worrying you do.

Source:Reader’s Digest